When Jesus Passes By You

I stand in a circle over the accused.  Holding what I think is redemption in my hand.  Sharp edges.  Mine has some.  But then…..so does my own soul.

And I see the guilty.  There on the ground.  Grasping for dirt to cloth himself in.

Incapable to run.  This time.

And I marvel at the fact that after laboring so long…..I am the one here.  Standing over him.  Exploiting his sin.

No longer the victim.  And it feels good.

Rejoicing. At last. That my legs have the strength to stand…..

In light of what happened.

But, then I see Him…..

Jesus.

The one they say is Holy.  And I am sure he sees me and knows what I have gone through…..and will likely join me…..

For He hates sin.  And loves justice.

And I reach over the one engulfed by His fears…..Grabbing another stone…..and rubbing the side of its corner slowly…..

Before giving it over to Jesus.

But, He must not have seen me.  He passes by me.  Leaving stone unnoticed in my palm of my hand.

He passes by me.

Walking by the majority…..and toward the lonely.  The one undeserving of mercy.  The guilty one.  The one lowly….

And He reaches out His hand.

Whispering lovingly in the ear of this one who offended me.  And how ready I was to throw my stone quickly…..

Only if Jesus would back away slowly.  So Guilty One would stand lonely…..like I have been so frequently…..

There.  Without Holiness beside him.

But, it grips me.  Unsettling.  How filth and Holiness can stand in such close proximity.

But, then Jesus, takes off His robe unassumingly. As if no one else is witnessing.  And covers the accused.

As if nothing ever happened.

And at this point…..I am really confused.

Is Jesus not condemning?  Does He not hate the sin?

Will He not come join us and take this rock that I saved just for Him…..to help us stone the guilty one.

Silence grips me.  Face twists with contempt.  I want to run to Jesus….rip him away from this sinner…..and beg Him….

NO!  Don’t you know the filth that he is covered in?  Didn’t you see what He did?  Can’t you somehow just let it all end.  This pain.  Please…just let me stone Him!

But, then guilty one….hiding dirt under the white garment of The Chosen One…..kneels humbly at the feet of Jesus.  Covered in only…..His garment of white….and the shadow of His Savior.

While I stand holding rocks.

And my law….the law that I have used to stand on….melts in the discerning sun.

And I see Jesus.  Now only garment.  Bending knee low, crouching next to the condemned one.

And why a faultless one would rescue a guilty one…..I’ll never know…..

But, then Jesus writes in the sand.

And I see them……

The sins that plague me so.  Anger…..which is like murder.  Lawlessness….that does not deliver. Judgement… which has lifted me so…..

To this point of holding stones.

And I shrink from this proud spot.  The rocks I once treasured and fondled….now become hot….burning the palm of my hand.

And then, I hear Him…..

He speaks…..this Sin Sider. This Guilty One Alligner.  He speaks deep into my soul……

“He who is without sin…..let Him cast the first stone.”

And they drop.  The weight of my sin in those two bitter rocks…..become too heavy to hold.

Letting them go…..dust rises at their entry into the lonely desert below.

And the uncertainty.  My questions…..All turn upon me.

There. In the face of Jesus.  As downcast eyes hope to shut these windows….to my soul.

But, then I hear in the distance from over my shoulder……

To the sinner…..or to me….I may never for certain know…..

Now you.  Go.  

Go…my beloved…..Go…And sin no more.

Linking with Women Living Well